MY WORST nightmare is the sheer thought of attending an event underdressed.
Seriously, I wake up in hot sweats just thinking of turning up to a wedding in daggy jeans or trackies, because I misread the invitation as ‘weeding day’.
Honestly, for someone who always does their best to dress well, there is nothing worse to me than not knowing what to wear.
Do you know what irks me? You’re invited to a gatho and you ask the host, what’s the dress code?
Their reply: ah, it’s just casual or something, just wear whatever. Oh, but don’t be too fancy.
Apparently, I have a bit of a reputation for over-dressing for occasions.
Nothing wrong with standards, people!
I am actually allergic to trackies.
Now, my interpretation of ‘casual’ is far different to a lot of people.
My ‘casual’ can range from a hoodie (a pretty one with no holes), to high heels with jeans.
For others, ‘casual’ can mean no shower, knotty hair and trackies.
See my problem?
I think there needs to be a complete overhaul of dress codes to match the times.
There are a bunch of Q&A sites and articles online with people asking ‘what do I wear to a wedding at 4pm?’, ‘is colour okay for a funeral?’ and ‘can I just wear black jeans to a black-tie event?’.
There are some seriously weird dress codes, like ‘business casual’, ‘creative black tie’ and ‘festive’.
Does a ‘festive’ dress code mean the most sparkly gown I own or reindeer ears and a cheesy sweater?
I propose new definitions of dress codes.
Let’s start with maximum overdrive.
Black tie/formal: Guys, this is an easy one for you – think James Bond. No, not your West Coast Eagles or bacon-themed tie.
Ladies, a ball gown, floor-length dress or a cocktail dress with statement jewellery will work.
High heels are generally the go.
Go full Beyonce-mode.
Cocktail: Blokes, put on your dress pants and dress shirt, but don’t feel you have to wear a tie.
Think of ‘cocktail’ as black tie in warmer weather.
Ladies, a cocktail dress is obviously the safest bet.
A knee-lengthish dress, optional high heels and perhaps a cute clutch as opposed to a chunky, heavy handbag.
Business formal: this is more for daytime functions, so go with your neatest work outfit, instead of blingy jewellery and semi-revealing outfits.
Dress pants, pencil skirts, tailored dresses, dress shirts and ties are the best options.
Dressy casual: this is my everyday safe option.
This can include a summery dress with flats or sandals, jeans with heels, neat jeans and a blazer, and casual button-up shirts.
Think going for coffee downtown or at the beach during spring.
Casual: most people’s favourite option.
‘Casual’ can range from slippers, trackies and a jumper, to jeans and trainers.
Depending on whether you are going to your nan’s for tea or having your girlfriend over for a movie night, I am sure you can adapt your ‘casual’ to give off the right vibe.
Honestly, putting in the effort to dress well, be it simply ironing that crinkly top or cleaning up the scuffs on your shoes, can make you feel good and let the world know you feel good.
Happiness is infectious, and if the world sees you feeling good about yourself, they might feel the tug of a smile too.
P.S. People totally notice if you are making an effort to dress properly.
The good type of noticing.